What Are You Stressed About?

Do you really know? Your first response may be, “everything” or “a lot of things.” But is that really the heart of the matter?

Take Stan. Stan is a successful business owner living in a small town, raising two wonderful kids with his wife. Owning a business is “a lot.” Most business owners wear multiple hats on a daily basis whether it’s dealing with finances, employees, logistics, customers, products, processes, planning, taxes, etc. Raising kids is no small feat either. Every day is filled to the brim with “want- tos” and “need-tos.” A small town is like a family and giving back is not an option— a business owner especially knows the value of supporting “local.” And let’s not forget the extended family on the home front. There is always something going on and someone who needs help. And we haven’t even mentioned Stan and his wife. What about their health? It’s hard to stay healthy when you’re this busy. What about their personal finances? Business owners are notorious for “taking care of things” when they have the money yet rarely take the time to plan things out deliberately and follow that plan.

What does Stan have to be stressed about? Everything, right? It might appear that way, but I would challenge that.

In Strategic Coach, it was a common practice to stop and “think about your thinking.” If Stan were to stop, he might start to see that everything he is stressed about leads back to one thing…or the lack thereof: TIME.

If there is one thing that Stan could change about his life and expect it to really move the needle, my best bet is that it would be finding more time.

We talk about ‘living Life on purpose.’ In reality, too many of us live like Stan. We continue the grind day after day and year after year until we burn out. Why?

Perhaps we can’t see any other way. We don’t stop and think about our thinking. We don’t ask ourselves hard truths about our situations.

If I ran into Stan and told him what we do to help business owners like himself, he would probably say something like, “We really need to do that.” I would also presume to say that getting Stan to start the process within the next year, two years or even ten would be slim to none. He doesn’t have the time!

As humorous as that might sound, it’s sad. A successful business owner doesn’t have the time to put on his own oxygen mask. Why?

He hasn’t stopped to think about his thinking. To take another one from Strategic Coach’s playbook: Stan’s answer is not in the question, how? It’s in the question, who? Stan needs some good people in his life that can give him back what he most desires. There’s no doubt there are countless objections to this, but I will just lay down the big one: No one will do it like me. And in this case, Stan is correct. And he is also wrong. There are a lot of things you do as a business owner that someone else can do a lot better. Which leads to a whole different conversation for another day.

The point is that you can either keep grinding it out or try something new. Whether you’re a business owner like Stan, a corporate executive, or simply can’t say no; I encourage you to think bout your thinking, ask yourself some hard truths, and find the one thing that will actually de-stress your life so you can truly live it on purpose!